My dreams tend to be pretty random, but every once in a while I’ll have a dream that is so incredibly vivid, so incredibly random, and so incredibly confusing. Last night’s dream was one for the ages.
I remember that I was in a hotel lobby or a gigantic lobby of an office building, and there was a reception going on. For some reason I was in a collared cotton dress shirt with my sleeves rolled up, wearing khaki cargo shorts and flip-flops while everyone else was in suits, dresses and tuxedos. The people in the room were from my past and present, and they were people who thought very little of me, people who went out of their way to be cruel to me, or people who have been incredibly fake and shallow, acting like my friend because they have to, but being very two-faced. My elementary school principal was talking with my ex-mother-in-law, and they were staring right at me as they talked….beyond surreal. As I went up to people to try and talk to them, they just stopped talking and stared right at me…..correction, they stared right through me, as if they could see my insecurities. It was like “the naked dream”, but I was emotionally naked instead. As I walked through this sea of negativity, I saw Lauryn, and I can’t even begin to describe the look of disgust on her face.
At that point, I got on the elevator…..there was nobody there but me, and it was eerily silent – no music, no nothing, just the sounds of the lobby on the other side of the doors. The walls of the elevator were olive green, the tops of the elevator walls were white, and it was incredibly bright. I don’t remember pushing any buttons, but I felt the elevator going up, and it got amazingly quiet. And then as random dreams tend to do, I have no idea of how I got there, but I ended up at the Ashokan Reservoir in my hometown of Shokan New York. This has always been a place of tranquility for me, from enjoying the sunsets with the mountains, or for going there on a perfectly full-moonlit summer night to take in the stars (and where I used to make out with a past girlfriend 30 years ago). In this dream, it was an incredibly bright, sunny warm summer afternoon….perfectly blue sky, and the sun almost seemed like winter sun glare, as it was so incredibly bright, but felt so incredibly warm. All I could hear was the sound of a small gong like you’d hear at a Buddhist service (and I remember the pitch was a Bb right under middle C)….it rang every 20 seconds or so, and as powerful as the ring was to my ears, I felt very centered.
This is when I saw my friend Sean Tarleton, who just said “What took you so long to get here, man?”, but it was the Sean that I remember from high school in 1985 (with his mullet haircut), yet I was still my current-day self. As bizarre as this seemed, it also felt incredibly…….normal. I vividly remember the smell of the summer leaves and the deep blue of the sky, almost as if I could reach out and touch them.
What does all of this mean? Was the elevator a metaphor for going to a better place? Was the lobby representing Hell, and the reservoir representing Heaven? Does it represent that my true friends are geographically further away than my local “friends?”
I used to go to this spot at the Reservoir a lot to practice my photography back in the early 90’s….I remember listening to a certain album a lot back in those days, David Benoit’s album “Every Step of the Way.” It always felt like a “sunny day” kind of album, and there was a track on there featuring bassist Nathan East called “No Worries”….I’ve equated that to sunny afternoons in Upstate New York, and I’ve been listening to the album while writing this blog post.
I’m still trying to make sense of this dream, and it’ll probably be in the back of my mind for the next few days……there’s something that I need to figure out, but I’m not there yet.
Whatever it is, I’ll get through it…..no worries.