firing on all cylinders.

I’m trying to find my motivation again. The motivation to get back in shape. The motivation to practice my Electronic Wind Instrument which I haven’t touched in weeks, as I have no gigs. I’m writing this post as I haven’t been motivated to write, and the feeling of being in neutral has been overwhelming.

For all the things rattling around in my brain, I can’t even begin to express any of them the right way. I’ve put a lot of focus on keeping friends and family updated about Otto, which I enjoy. This still does not change the feeling of only functioning at about 75-80% every day.

This goes beyond a New Year’s resolution….feeling mentally sluggish is a drag, and it’s not fair to the people around me. There, I put that out to the universe….now to focus on the positive.

One of my resolutions this year is to find the positive, even in negative situations. I’ve got a few situations in the future that are going to challenge the hell out of me. The thoughts and prayers of friends have been greatly appreciated. In the past, I’d dwell on the “potential catastrophic result” so that I could just stay in a sluggish state of mind. I’d be fully prepared to isolate and shut down. Going forward, I’m trying to “put a lid” on when to give time to focusing on negative situations, so that I don’t dwell on them for days at a time. This is why I’ve felt unmotivated.

My goal is to be firing on all cylinders….to be more focused, more motivated, and to look to the positive instead of just feeling blah.

Using this post to “jump start” my motivation has helped me today, and the goal is to no longer “break down” in staying motivated.