do the write thing.

“The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There’s also a negative side.”

Hunter S. Thompson

If I were to never sing or play another note, I could totally live with that. This isn’t to say that I’m not going to be doing music anymore….I’m more focused on writing for the immediate future. Although Hunter Thompson’s quote is very extreme, there is some validity to what he says about the music business, and that’s the part of the industry that I don’t want to be a part of anymore.

As I write this blog post, I’m beginning the process of decluttering. I’m overwhelmed by all of the music stuff I have, from musical instruments to books, CD’s and DVD’s….they’ve all served me well over the years, but now it’s time to let some of them go. I’m hoping to eventually donate as much as I can to the school districts in California impacted by the wildfires. Perhaps some students will enjoy my instruments and albums the way I used to enjoy them. At least with writing, I can do it anywhere at any time, and I have just as much enjoyment as I had playing and singing.

Writing is both challenging and therapeutic. It’s always been easy to “hide” when playing music, as it is a distraction for a few hours from other issues that may be bothering me. Writing is more about facing those issues head on and working through them.

I need to write this next paragraph as a confession – I no longer sing with the Uptown Vocal Jazz Quartet, but I could’ve (and should have) handled the situation differently regarding my departure. Truth be told, I hit the wall – I wasn’t enjoying playing gigs, and I just needed a hard stop to reevaluate what I wanted to do (or not do) musically. To Ginny, Holly and Robert, I hope you can accept my sincerest apology. I’ll do better going forward.

The thing most enjoyable about writing is that I don’t feel any pressures or expectations from others. I write whenever I feel like writing, and I write whatever I’m feeling – although there’s vulnerability involved, there’s also a feeling of satisfaction of being able to convey my thoughts in a creative way.

Things may change, where music becomes the priority again, but if that doesn’t happen, that’s OK….I’m enjoying singing with my church choir, and doing the occasional gigs with my friend Ryan. I’ll just take things one day at a time, and continue to find ways to express my creativity.

Write on!