Author Archives: ltrainlane

I needed to write this morning. I felt this burst of energy that would not let me fall back asleep, even though its Saturday morning at 7:21 am, and I don’t have to get up for anything this morning. My close friends and some of my family are aware of this, and I’ve gone backContinue reading “mental sunlight. (aka kicking depression in the ass)”

Yesterday was EXACTLY the day that I needed. After what can only be described as a mentally exhausting week last week, I had the opportunity to go back to my alma mater yesterday, the Ithaca College School of Music. This was the first time I had been back since October of 2012, and the 7Continue reading “ithaca forever.”

That I not only got through last week, but I felt a genuine outpouring of love and support as well. The wonderful folks at both Washington Street UMC in Alexandria and at CSLMetro in Arlington. That we turn the clocks forward in 13 days. The new XFL – it’s nice to see players who areContinue reading “8 things for which i’m thankful. 2/24/20”

This is one those times that I’m thankful that blog writing has been such a tremendous asset and a very helpful outlet for me. Sometimes you don’t realize that you’re a powder keg until you explode. It can be an outward meltdown, or a internal reaction that just makes you shut down completely. My depressionContinue reading “i really like brussel sprouts.”

This was a weekend to remember. Nothing extravagant took place….in fact, it was a very fun and calm weekend, between Valentine’s Day, playing gigs, spending a day at Avalon, and then spending the holiday in the La-Z-Boy. This weekend was about realization, and making peace with things about my life as I’ve gotten older. IContinue reading “walls and ceilings.”

My beautiful wife. Girl Scout S’Mores cookies. The upcoming three-day weekend. Year-round miniature golf. The sound of happiness. The possibilities of reconnection. James Taylor. Caring about others first and foremost.

Quite a few people have asked me this question. Although she’s still around. we haven’t crossed paths yet. I made a decision to forgive her late last year. This is why I haven’t made mention of her in quite a while, and it’s also why I’ve focused on having a more positive outlook with myContinue reading “whatever happened to “miss vitriol 2019?“”

I had a strange dream last night…I had an identical twin, but at any given moment, I could switch back and forth between the two of us, kind of like John Travolta and Nicolas Cage in FaceOff…there wasn’t any violence in the dream, but I could see things from two very different perspectives. The lastContinue reading “one shade of grey.”

That 13 years ago today, I was blessed with the birth of my beautiful daughter. Inner strength, that I too often forget that I have. Being fortunate to work with colleagues that genuinely help each other. The ability to make goofy faces on Snapchat. The kindness of strangers. The smell of cinnamon danish-scented hand soap.Continue reading “8 things i’m thankful for today. 2/7/2020”

Tough night tonight. I’m probably not going to see my daughter this weekend for her birthday, as texted to me by my ex-wife (my daughter’s choice, not mine), and I just needed to get the fuck out of the house. I had no idea of where to go, and I couldn’t reach anybody by phoneContinue reading “karaoke….my antidepressant tonight.”